What’s the most astonishing act of laziness you’ve witnessed thus far? – reddit repost

2012.11.22 07:39:29 by andy category : reddit&4ch Tags :funny text

This one time I went into a convenience store and I saw this fat kid sitting on the ground close to the door crying. I overheard the store owner ask the mother what was wrong, and she said that he didn't want to open the door.

That's actually impressive.

'Twas yesternight when, seeking food, I wandered thus into that shoppe Where spotted I, in sullen mood A weeping boy, like such a prop! How wailed he there, without a care To free himself from awful state, Had only he to do his share In bursting vic'trous through that gate! Tho' yet, it was his mother's sin Did let that child a double chin. [Edited for grammatical accuracy — Thanks to filologos for correcting me]

I fracking love randomly stumbling onto your posts.

This kid wins the thread.

There was a pizza shop right below my student complex… I called for delivery every other day.

My housemates and I tried doing the same thing but the restaurant workers got wise and just started guilting us into coming down and getting it ourselves.

I was at my friend's house, sitting and watching a movie (with her) in her living room. The kitchen is a few steps over in the next room. Her brother, who is foraging in the pantry, notices that the dog's water bowl (in the kitchen, by the refrigerator, literally three feet from the sink) is empty. This boy (about 8 years old at the time) saunters over to it, picks it up, and walks right past the sink into the living room. He offers the empty bowl to his sister. "[Name], the water bowl is empty. Go fill it." ಠ___ಠ

I don't know what it is about little tasks like this, but I often feel so ridiculously lazy that I just don't want to do it. I'm in the kitchen, it's time to feed the dog, but I don't want to bend over to scoop her kibble out of the container. So I call my boyfriend to do it. Is there a random sock on the floor? Yes. Am I going to pick it up? No. I'll make my rounds when it's laundry day. Is there old food in the fridge? Yes. Is it going to get thrown out? No. Is there a cup on my desk from a few nights ago? Yes. Am I going to move it to the sink? No. Are there laundry baskets with unfolded clothes? Yes. Am I going to fold anything? No. I'm going to just dig through the baskets every morning for things to wear All things considered though, we're not that messy. Our house is clean and neat. I'm just too lazy to do the small tasks.

You can just pick things like socks on the ground up with your feet. No more bending over!

My mom asked me to vacuum the living room. I didn't want to, and nobody was home, so I just rolled the vacuum all over the carpet to make the little lines. As soon as I finished, I realized that if I would have just turned it on, it would have been the same amount of effort. I was not a clever child. Some things have not changed.

I swear I read this in a thread yesterday…you're so lazy you reuse your posts

Hahaha. Similar story: My mom asked me to vacuum the living room carpet (it's just a rug, and you can't see the lines on it). I didn't think it needed to be vacuumed so I went into the closet, turned the vacuum so it faced another way, and continued with my day. I admitted to it a few days later and my mom thought it was hilarious because she said she actually went to check the closet to see if I had moved the vacuum.

Not the laziest but my parents used to get us with it all the time when we were little: they are already in bed downstairs and call us down to speak to them (most of the time we are already in bed too) and when we get to the doorframe to speak to them, they ask us to shut off the light.

When I was a kid (about 4, before I could read) my mom drew directions on how to make a cup of coffee with powdered coffee mix. On an index card, there was 4+ a drawing of a spoon with coffee mix, then a drawing of a cup, then a drawing of the microwave with 1 minute on it. My mom would only let me wake her up early in the morning if I brought a cup of coffee to her.

My husband charges his phone in the kitchen. I text him so that he'll get up and go check it. When he reads the text, it'll say "while you're up, can you get me a drink?" I get a chuckle from him AND a drink!

Too clever. Nice work. o/

\o I don't know if that was suppose to look like you were raising your hand for a high five, but if it was I didn't want to leave you hanging.

It was and thank you.

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